Real Talk. All About Confusion. Let’s Get Personal.

pigeon on ESB 500x375 Real Talk. All About Confusion. Lets Get Personal.

Okay. Ready for some real talk? I speak a lot of shit on here. Half of what I say can’t be taken seriously because I douse everything I say in gasoline and set it on fire before I post it. But contrary to popular belief, I’m a real person, and I think day one of 2010 is a good time to let you know a little about myself. I give you plenty of glimpses into my life, but I’m never straightforward, and I think it’s becoming counterproductive to what I’m trying to do.

I’m in grad school getting my MBA in marketing. I spent four years studying finance and then realized there’s no way I could make that my career. I was surrounded by people who read books about Wall St. on the weekends. That wasn’t me. I’m interested in marketing, particularly digital marketing and social media, and (obviously) music. I’ve had some experience working at a major label, and I’m really hoping to end up with a job in the music industry after this year.

Want to get personal? I’m white, mostly Polish. I’ve lived in CT, Sweden, VA, FL, and NY. I grew up listening to MJ, Jimi, Bob Marley, Jimmy Cliff, Roxette, and The Beatles. I moved on to Nirvana, The Pixies, Rage, Prodigy, etc. I fell in love with hip-hop when my sister gave me a Gangstarr CD and A Tribe Called Quest CD. Best birthday presents ever. After that it was nothing but 2Pac, Eminem, Biggie, Big L, Jay-Z and the classics. I went through a couple of years when I listened to almost nothing but underground hip-hop – Atmosphere, DPD, Cage, Cannibal Ox, El-P, Aesop Rock, Living Legends, and some really obscure abstract stuff. I also went through a couple of years when I was in love with the Grateful Dead, Phish, jazz, blues, jam bands, and I switched to indie rock after that. I guess I jumped all over the place. It wasn’t until college that I realized that I loved music of all kinds, and I was done trying to find my niche. I don’t have one.

Want to get really personal? I’m very introverted. I love people but there aren’t too many people who get really close to me. I’m pretty sure I’ve got general anxiety disorder and sleep disorder. I think I’ve acquired a good business sense through my education and experience, but at heart I’m artistic and I value creativity above everything. I wish I wasn’t, but I’m extremely sensitive, and although I take on an “I don’t care” mentality a lot of the time, I usually do.

I try to keep it real and be as honest as I can in here and I’ve never said anything I haven’t meant, but I’ve always felt like I’m kind of straddling multiple worlds. Whether it be business and creativity, rock and hip-hop, or reality and trying to seem “cool” and appealing to the people who read this blog. But I think it’s important to put everything on the table and just be me. I hope that I can somehow merge all these sides of myself into one and take flight with that. Thank you all for sticking with me through this first year. As stupid as it may seem, this blog has been an important outlet and has helped me keep my sanity in a world in which I’m not sure where I fit. It means a lot to me.

Hello 2010.