The 2011 MTV Video Music Awards in Pictures

Last year I did the 2010 MTV Video Music Awards in Pictures. This just seemed like the logical thing to do. The 2011 VMAs was watched by 12.4 million people, the highest viewership of anything ever to be on the MTV network. When that many people are watching famous people dress up to meet in a big room and give each other awards, great things are bound to happen. And happen they did.

Hit the jump to see…

Nicki Minaj humbly appeared in a sophisticated, subtle outfit, reminding us all that classic style never goes out of fashion.

Justin Bieber took the blank stare to a new peak. Every time the cameras cut to Bieber’s face, his expression was one of complete mental vacancy. My friend in high school had a dog that I’m sure was mentally handicapped. I never asked because, “Aw, cute dog. It is retarded, no?” sounded offensive, but when I looked into that dog’s eyes I knew there was very little going on in that dog’s brain. Still, if I had to choose a partner for a math quiz or spelling bee, I would choose my friend’s retarded dog over Justin Bieber.

Uh. Stop doing that.

I’m not sure why Jared from Subway was there, but there he is. I think everyone likes him because he is just a regular guy, trying to be healthy in America. Good for him!

Sure, he’s on the VMA red carpet, but Ronnie still treats every camera as if it was just another bro.

Still, clearly no idea what is going on right now. Probably is not even aware that somebody put a snake in his hand.

The Madden brothers desperately tried to maintain a punk rock edge by combining sunglasses, tattoos, leather, goatees, sideways caps, anarchy symbols, cutoff sleeves, and mean mugs. Their valiant efforts were negated when they posed with a Jonas brother.

Tyler may have won Best New Artist, but if Wiz Khalifa lost, then I’m not sure I understand the concept behind this winning/losing thing.

As  indicated by her nervous laughter, Britney is confused by this “Lady Gaga” character. She remembers a simpler time, when camel toes and nip slips were the focal point of pop stardom.

If you’re already of the opinion that Chris Brown is a douchebag, this will probably just confirm it for you – this is what he looks like while suspended in air.

The diss that Wayne directed at Jay-Z just got Trumped. Is this “the bitch” you were talking about kidnapping, Weezy? Bad timing. If Jay just ignores that whole line and never addresses this “beef” again, I’m pretty sure he’ll come out on top.

This year, MTV imported this handicapped British girl to sing other people’s songs between the real performances. It was probably part of some diversity initiative or “making dreams come true” campaign. Not sure, but I’m happy for her.

It’s tempting to make fun of Drake for wearing this big sweater during a summer night in Los Angeles, especially since he’s supposed to be from Canada, but then Lil Wayne came out and the cardigan jokes didn’t seem very funny.

Lil Wayne wore ladies’ jeggings. Funny joke, right? Until we learned that it was true.

When Katy Perry went on stage with Kanye to accept her award, she just had to go and make a reference to Kanye’s legendary VMA moment. I imagine that this is probably what Kanye’s face looks like the second he decides to have someone killed.

Old people are usually easy targets for jokes, but Tony Bennett seems more aware of his surroundings than I am of mine, and he’s definitely cooler than I’ll ever be.

Odd Future acted wild, ’cause they’re rebels. It’s slightly less convincing since they’re on stage at an MTV awards show, but one of them has a super crazy hat on! That shit cray.

Jay-Z and Kanye performed “Otis” and looked just as happy as they did in the music video. There were pyrotechnics, flashing lights, and a giant American flag. Fire, lights, stars, and stripes. That pretty much sums up the night. Good times, VMAs. See you next year.