Google is a helpful, important tool. But it’s still a tool. Back in the ’90s, when someone asked you a question that you couldn’t answer, you’d have to make up a lie and make sure it was complicated enough to keep the person from asking anymore questions. Otherwise you’d just shrug, shake your head with disappointment, and reply, “Nobody knows.”
“Dad, how do turbines work?”
“Nobody knows, son. Nobody knows.”
Ah, the simple ways of the ’90s. These days, if somebody asks you a question, it’s usually stupid. “Just Google it, you asshole. I am a person, not a search engine. Do not ask me things.” So we Google everything, and Google has gotten so smart that it thinks it knows us. It even tries to finish our sentences, like an annoying twin sister with less personality than her counterpart. But ever search something and Google tries to finish your inquiry with some weird suggestions of its own? Things always get hilarious.
The Internet seem to be suspicious of almost every famous person being dead or gay, even if they are alive and not gay. And if they are dead, the Internet is very suspicious that they are actually hiding. Just take a look below and see what Google thinks you’re thinking.