Action Bronson - Professional Wrestler
Have you seen the size of Action Bronson? If he's not all bubbly and high, and you ran into him on the street, you would probably fear his respectable size and, even more so, his incredibly intimidating beard. We're not really thinking of UFC, though. We think that Action Bronson would be a great addition to the WWE because not only does he have moves—have you seen him take out stage-rushers?—he's got personality. His wrestling name? The Cheffonade (to chiffonade, a cutting technique, is to slice things into long, thin strips... so, you know, Bam Bam will cut you up). His move? The Meat Tenderizer (he'd just beat on you repeatedly, like he would tenderizing meat).