I know my 10 solid, well-thought-out reasons won’t do shit to stop the international powerhouse that is the Biebz, but I’ve always been told to stand up for what you believe in and to try to do the right thing. Fuck it. Reasons Justin Bieber shouldn’t rap:
01. Everyone else already raps.
02. He’s already rich.
03. DJ Premier told him he’s not allowed at the BET cyphers and called him “honey.”
04. Last year he announced that his rap name is “Shawty Mane.” Okay, and I’m gonna start a pop career and be “Miley Bieber.”
05. His rap voice is annoying. (“But I neva knew dat dreams really came true.”)
06. Once a whale kissed him.
07. If Suge Knight takes an interest, things could go sour.
08. He could alienate his true fans.
09. He still isn’t allowed to use swear words, is he?
10. Bieber’s going to take all our bitches. All the bitches in the world.
Still, Bieber raps. Hit the jump if you haven’t seen it yet…