Nothing is surprising anymore. We grew up on the internet with unlimited access to weird porn and gory violence and ignorant absurdity and now we are immune to everything the world has to offer. Who knows what impact this will have on humanity (probably just makes us masturbate more and think weirder internet-y thoughts), but in music it has really pushed things to new levels of ridiculousness.

We are living in a post-Spooky Black world. We’ve got a pasty white kid in Minnesota with the voice of an angel, making awkward YouTube videos of himself in du-rags and FUBU, and we’re sitting around LOLing at in online.

And there’s the one person in the conversation like, “But the song is actually FIRE I’m not even kidding! Spooky Black is actually really talented!”

And then there’s another person like, “Dude, this is a joke, right?”

And then there’s the fucker who’s like, “Would you even be listening if it wasn’t for this corny, ironic video though?”

Then another fucker: “You guys, FUBU? Spooky Black? This is racist.”


Sitting on a mustard-colored couch in a middle class living room, there is a dad with a cell phone in his face, reacting to a YouTube video of Spooky Black so his son can Vine it.

Then thousands of people respond with racially charged hate via the comments section to a Vine of a dad reacting to a YouTube video of Spooky Black.

Somewhere, in a dark bedroom in middle America, a young boy masturbates to weird German porn.

This is the world we live in, and it’s completely normal.

And I’m alright with it. Nothing is absurd anymore, nothing is confusing, everything makes sense because whatever, it’s the internet.

But somehow, this “Serious Thugs” video still has me unsure about what’s happening. Like, I like it. The pop sensibility is present. The producer, DJ Warlord, is talented. The visuals are awesome in that documentary-style, entering-a-new-world kind of way.┬áBut… the segway. The guy on the segway, then the guy with the face tats, and the girl with the albino snake. The fashion! The soda! What soda even IS that? It’s like J-pop meets British gangsta rap meets experimental dance music, and I honestly don’t know if it’s next-level irony or if these guys are just way ahead of the curve. Am I officially old and out of the loop? Is there some weird new porn shit going on that I don’t know about? Have I been spending too much time offline?

Nothing is absurd anymore, but this video has my brain in knots. I’m gonna go Google human death and German porn because this “Serious Thugs” shit is blowing my fucking mind.