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ScHoolboy Q has been transparent about his rap career getting in the way of a desire to be home with his daughter—so much so that he strongly considered quitting rap after the release of 2014’s Oxymoron.

Of course, with his new album Blank Face currently blaring through speakers across the country, he stuck with it. The earliest stages of the album came with uncertainty, however, as he revealed to Rolling Stone. Still upset about time he lost with his daughter while immersed in music, he returned to the studio last year and came out with what he calls “depressed rap.”

“I switched the whole album up as I got into myself and I got comfortable again,” he says, unhappy with the tone of those recordings. “I told myself, stop crying like a little bitch and do what you love to do.”

Everything produced from those early sessions was cut from the album and kept for himself. “It was like a confession thing,” he explains. “I didn’t want people to hear me like that. That depression doesn’t last. A few months, and then it was over.”

Y’all are never hearing them records.

Like his previous material, it’s important to point out that the music that did end up on the album isn’t what most would describe as “happy” and maintains a hard streetwise edge. As he puts it, “All my music is pretty much dark. This is the first time I’ve even put color into the album cover.”

Blank Face is available to stream here.